How to Let an Alcoholic Go

Published: 21st October 2010
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I'm going to share with you three ways you can let go of the person in your life who is an alcoholic. First let's take a look to see if you actually have a hold on them. Do you constantly think about them wondering if the will drink today or if they already have? Do you go out of your way to spy on them to see what they are up to? When they enter the room, do you have a tendency to analyze them to see if they are drunk? Do you consciously or subconsciously try to manipulate them so that they cannot have a drink? If you answered yes to any of the above questions, then there's probably a good chance that someone's drinking habits are effecting your actions.

An alcoholism support group called Al-anon teaches that as we continue to interact with an alcoholic, our thinking becomes distorted, we become irritable and unreasonable without even knowing it. If that sounds like you, then continue reading because I have a few things that can help you learn how to let go of this troublesome situation.

Here are three suggestions to help with letting go of an alcoholic:

1. You do not have any control over their choice to consume alcohol. Understanding this foundational principle will help you let go of them. Think about this for a moment, has anything that you have ever said or done actually made them quit drinking for good? I would guess you answered no. So, it's time to try something different.

2. Get involved with an alcoholism support group. This is where the real power is found in letting go of an alcoholic. It takes the help of others who know how to let go to teach you how. The Al-anon program is a great place to find, not only the strength to let go, but also lasting friendships with people who know exactly what you are going through.

3. Start enjoying your life again by doing some things you like rather than constantly obsessing over what the alcoholic is doing. A good place to start is by making a list of things, pick one and then... "just do it."

The process of letting go of an alcoholic is all about changing your current focus and behaviors. Somehow we get entangled in all of THEIR drama and we lose ourselves in the process. One day at a time, as we begin to do things a little differently, we become less effected by their behaviors. This process of change is like having an empty bucket that eventually gets filled one small drop at a time. I am sure that you did not get into this mess overnight. It's going to take some steady changes over time for you to get untangled from the enmeshment with this individual. The best place to learn how to make these changes is by attending support group meetings designed to help friends and family members who are dealing with alcoholics.

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